With Brave Wings She Flies!

WITH BRAVE WINGS SHE FLIES!

It's been almost a year since I left the church I had been a part of for close to 20 years. With all the courage I could muster, I walked out of the inner world of protocol, dogma and dictation and out into a world of uncertainty and misgiving. I waited for the sky to fall, for the serpent to bite, for the wrath of God to shake his finger at me and claim me a heretic doomed for hell's fires. Every slip away from the rules and regulations I had so faithfully adhered to, was followed by accusations that I was the devil's advocate and would soon be "seven times worse than before."

It wasn't a hasty nor a light decision. It began a few years prior, when in a desperate cry for relief from a monotonous, insipid life, I began to pray that God would take every ounce of religious spirit out of me and to help me to be a proper representative of him. Over the years, the splits, fighting, hurt and drama I had witnessed at church and in the religious world at large, I knew God could not be the instigator of it all. I was so discouraged and let down. I could not envision the entire world being locked down in this systematic way of living. Though I knew the world at large has great needs, this routine was not the answer.

I read several books by different women who were involved in religious cults. I saw the same fears of leaving, of God's wrath, of being the only way to heaven used on each one of these women. It opened my eyes to the manipulation of fear, and I saw that what was holding me to that church was no longer a love for Christ and his work; Somewhere along the way, that had been lost in all the do's and dont's and the complete take over of my life. I knew I was no longer happy there, that I was dying inside and they did not have the solution. And I knew that the only thing that was continuing to hold me there, was fear.

In the mean time, God was working so gently within my heart, calling me closer to him and giving me my wings. I read a book titled Half The Sky written by two journalist who traveled to several countries and witnessed the violation and oppression of women and young girls in developing countries. The stories in this book were absolutely horrific; A complete paradigm shift was going on inside of me. Little by little God began to rock my world so severely and I knew I needed to leave religion behind me.

One day it dawned upon me that these women were in countries and/or positions where they had no say about what was being done them. I thought about all the religious oppression world wide where torture and blood shed awaits any who would dare question the system. And here I was in AMERICA- the land of the FREE choosing OPPRESSION! I knew at that moment that this was not just about me. My freedom was about every man, woman and child out there who have no rights. My freedom was not to be taken lightly. My freedom was their HOPE!

One day I saw a vision of myself. I was in a large cage, curled up in a ball, crying. The door of the cage was wide open but I was too terrified to leave, because I believed the serpent waited without to devour me. Then God spoke to me and told me to use my wings and fly away.

It took a great amount of courage to leave flying straight towards my deepest fear. But the day I flew away, a great load lifted off of me and I knew, I had just taken my first step towards TRUE FREEDOM!- That freedom that comes from within, that nothing in this world can ever steal away- that freedom of KNOWING I have wings, and God is the wind beneath them, and that nothing could ever separate me from him. The day I walked away, was the beginning of my personal inner freedom;

Thank God for America- May God bless her. May she rise up and hold the freedom she still has left. May she continue to hold a scepter of HOPE out to the world.

Freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed.

Martin Luther King, Jr.